Paging Lego Santa…

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So I think this will be the first Christmas where my family actually does not put up a tree and frankly…I’m kind of relieved. I know that sounds terrible and really “un-Christmaslike” but it’s true. This doesn’t mean I’m totally jumping ship and celebrating Hanukkah–besides I can’t even if I wanted to, it’s practically over now–it’s just now it feels like decorating the tree is starting to seem more like a chore and not something I enjoy doing. We have this huge plastic evergreen tree that we assemble every year and put a crap load of ornaments on. There’s the obligatory red, green, blue, silver and gold orbs everyone hangs on their trees but then somewhere in the past four years my mom has accumulated even more stuff to hang/stick in there that I don’t even recognize.

The sad thing is, I think if it was any other person’s tree–and way smaller–I’d be a lot more excited to decorate it. I guess we were at one time operating on that assumption “bigger is better,” when in reality “bigger” is annoying as hell to lug out of a cardboard box, drag up two sets of steps and screw together. When I was in preschool and kindergarten our family had a much much smaller plastic evergreen tree because it was four of us in a two-bedroom apartment. With a tree that small you knew what was going on it: about 16 small frosted orb ornaments, a brass reindeer with our family name on it, thumb-sized angels, a ceramic train that a friend made for my mom nearly 30 years ago. And then there was Lego Santa.

Lego Santa was not a hanging ornament, but instead a Santa Claus replica made of cube and trapezoid-shaped Lego pieces which sat under our tree on the end table. I’m going to assume my brother created him, but it sounds cooler to say he was sent to my apartment living room through a beam of light from the Lego Heavens to spread holiday cheer. Like that previous sentence, this is going to sound really stupid, but Lego Santa was almost kind of sacred to me in a weird kind of way. I knew not to mix Lego Santa with the rest of the Legos in the Lego box. He was only meant to come out during the holidays. Like, if you ever saw him out of context, like on the Fourth of July, your face should just burn off.

But there still had to be SOME tree there in place of the original tree’s spot. Now there’s a tall fake tree my mom strung Christmas lights around. I don’t even know what kind of tree it is. It’s actually kind of refreshing to see something else there other than the usual humongous tree. Just as long as she doesn’t ask us to put ornaments on it. I think Lego Santa would roll around in his grave if we try to put an ornament on anything without pine needles.

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