If only the real world could be powered by doughnuts

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While I have no desire to join Cityville, Farmville or any of those virtual towns I get requests for, I do wonder how much better (or worse) my life would be if I REALLY lived there and was an active participant:

 

You know you had a rough night/you have a hallucinogenic drug dependency if you leave a hotel and there's a bird that isn't even a parrot telling you in English to have a nice day.

 

Okay...worst and fattest cops ever. From the beginning of August I counted 20 REQUESTS for this. You don't need doughnuts anymore. You need insulin. And a treadmill

 

I'll save the seahorse but I'll be damned if I save the snake. Twenty bucks says it bites me the first chance it gets. Look how colorful it is. The brightest ones are almost ALWAYS the most poisonous ones....

 

I guess they're real proponents of afternoon drinking here (This was a Sunday. Yes I checked the calendar). Also thank God they said upfront what was in there. I just saw a mason jar with a picture of what I THINK is a squirrel on the side and I didn't know what to think.

 

What is it with this city and doughnuts? Are these fresh out the oven Krispy Kreme doughnuts we're talking about? Why are the criminals wearing Batman & Robin style eye bands? What made them cry? Police brutality? SO MANY QUESTIONS

 

Are we getting a jumpstart on celebrating Bastille Day? Because you're six days too late for America. This town is horribly unpatriotic if it takes baseball caps to inspire them.

 

The caramel ferret is the only one that's really selling it here. The deer is PRANCING in this photo. She does not look poor, injured or wounded in the slightest. She had better develop some fierce looking "Precious Moments" sad eyes if she wants a home.

 

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