Monthly Archives: February 2013

Littlenightowl’s Unsung 90′s Hip Hop Video Heroes – Week 3

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Week 3:
The woodwind wielding woman who brought us to the dance floor
Rump Shaker – Wreckx-N-Effect (1992)

OK before I get a bunch of complaints that this is sexist hear me out.  This woman will always be the one image I associate with this song for a variety of reasons:

(1) She proves that you can be a woman of many talents in a rap video besides just sitting in a hot tub next to Diddy.

(2) She’s breaking gender stereotypes by secondary school concert band standards. That’s not a flute she’s playing out there. Also you can’t be out in the surf with a flute. The pads under the keys would get wet. The mouthpiece would rust. You probably couldn’t do trills and—ALRIGHT. I PLAYED THE FLUTE IN HIGH SCHOOL. THIS IS HOW I KNOW THIS OK?

and

(3) If this was a baritone sax she could just release the spit valve into the ocean. She’s already wet. It’s genius.

Littlenightowl’s Unsung 90′s Hip Hop Video Heroes – Week 2

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Week 2:
The woman who eats it hard on her bike while trying to impress Redman
I’ll Bee Dat – Redman (1998)

Redman, who stars in possibly the best episode of MTV Cribs in recorded history, released “I’ll Bee Dat” as a spoof on a variety of rap videos, workout tapes and TV commercials. The video from start to finish is hilarious. But as someone who’s watched America’s Funniest Home Videos since pre-k, of course it was the the part where a cute girl Wayne’s Worlded her way into a car that ultimately did it for me. The woman in this part of the video served as a reminder to focus less on looking cute and more on bicycle helmet safety.

No plans to watch the video? Here’s the breakdown:

Girl sees boy

Boy sees girl

Girl says hi to boy

Boy says hi back

Girl forgets she’s on a moving thing with wheels

Girl’s bike says hi to car bumper

The car bumper doesn’t say hi back

Girl eats shit on rear car window

Boy holy shits himself

Girl receives zero medical attention

Littlenightowl’s Unsung 90’s Hip Hop Video Heroes – Week 1

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For the next four weeks of Black History Month I will be paying tribute to the African Americans who enhanced my music video watching during my formative years.

Week 1:
The guy keeping abreast of global politics during a South Central, L.A. craps
game
Today Was a Good Day – Ice Cube (1993)

 About two minutes before Ice Cube is swarmed by the entire LAPD SWAT team at his own house, he was having a pretty good day. He didn’t get stopped by the cops on his way to a lighthearted game of craps. Everybody was into the game except this guy (and possibly a second guy in the left corner):

 He seemingly doesn’t even get shit from his friends about obviously not joining in on the fun, proving that sometimes gangbangers just wanna put their feet up and learn more about the global AIDS crisis before taking a roll of the die.

How To Make a Popeyes Chicken Game Bucket in 7 Steps (Superbowl Sunday Edition)

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After the Baltimore Ravens’  heartbreaking AFC Championship loss last year to the New England Patriots, two of my friends and I decided to drown our sorrows in a nearby Popeyes chicken restaurant. I’m not sure if there was enough saltiness to absorb our sorrow but it certainly didn’t help when my friend unsheathed this particular bank card to pay for it:

Arrgghrrrrrrr

 

Flash forward to one year later: Before our rematch two weeks ago I was determined that we were not going eat sad Popeyes again. On top of that, I had seen a bunch of commercials leading up to AFC and NFC championship games about a KFC Gameday bucket and thought, “Why in the hell does Popeyes not have a game day bucket? I’m going to fix that.”

 Step 1: Visit the enemy. 

I prefer a KFC/Taco Bell combination since that isn’t as abrasive to my eyes.

 

Step 2: Ask for a free bucket. Bring it home.

The cashier laughed in my face but whatever I GOT TWO FREE BUCKETS

 

 

Step 3: Cover the enemy’s writing with white printer or construction paper.

 

 

Step 4: Visit heaven and order 4 to 5 6-pc boxes of spicy Popeyes chicken wings.

 

 

Step 5: Swipe a bag or placemat. Cut out the logo on the front with scissors.

 

Step 6: Cover the virginal white bucket fronts with the Popeyes emblem.

 

 

Step 7: Fill and EAT

Happy Superbowl Sunday