Here’s the equation. It’s kind of long but I tried to be as brief as possible:
A trip to a shopping center in my co-worker’s car to grab lunch to go
+ Some random guy walking behind me as I exited Shoppers and entered her car.
+ Him mumbling something to her about a magazine and saying “I want to sex you up.”
+ Us driving away while laughing hysterically.
+ Being reminded of the time when a middle-aged guy stopped me at the Shoppers salad bar last year and told me I was “just as fine as I wants to be.” Not want…WANTS. Sigh.
x Two co-workers on two different occasions finding pigeon feathers in their salads at the same bar
= Being thoroughly creeped out by Shoppers Food Warehouse
Wednesday’s encounter prompted her to post a gchat status asking why she was hit on using a lyric from a Color Me Badd song. This was my gchat status and the response I received:
i’ll pay someone in cookies to study the correlation between shoppers food warehouse and skeevy men
mars858: x-axis=probability that young attractive females will show up at a shoppers location, y-axis=number of skeevy men. it starts at 1 because no matter the probability, any shoppers location will have SOME skeeviness: http://www.sosmath.com/algebra/logs/log4/log42/gl01.gif
and i love google images
this is awesome
you can have as many cookies as you want
mars858: haha yesss
me: warning: they might be from shoppers
mars858: uh oh… that’s a whole other graph right there